I’ve now finished my second edit of the novel.
I’m still concerned that the ending might be a little weak
but at least I’m aware of that and fairly confident that it will come as I make
other changes.
This time I’ve sharpened up the tension in the Renate strand
– I’ve added in more conflict by strengthening the voice in the head. If this ever does become a play, this will be
an SS officer. I’ve given him his own font and I’ve actually added a little
more to each of his speeches.
I’ve added an extra scene. The Hani strand had a big hole in
it and I had not included any actual bombing scenes anywhere except in Renate’s
nightmares. It seemed useful to put in a scene where Stuttgart is bombed. I’m
not sure I yet have enough tension in this scene. Again, I think it will come.
I’d noticed much repetition about lumps in people’s throats.
I’ve gone through the whole text and replaced all but one with another way of saying
the same thing or another way of showing emotion.
I’ve yet again checked another story line – only to find I had
got it right. I wonder where all those doubts
come from.
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